At the End of A year

Today is the 24th. As, always, we will have our dinner table full this Christmas Eve. 

Years ago, it was the whole family. Mom, Dad, brother, sister, children. Now Mom and Dad are no longer with us, brother goes off to the in laws.

This is always such a bitter sweet time of year. Its wonderful to have the children here. Its great to have our friends share this special night, but there are a few empty places now. Mom, Dad and a dearly loved son, all who have gone on from this world.

Its a time of year where i fight against the dark overwhelming emotion of depression. If i do not keep busy, i sink into utter despair. 

Last night, after speaking to T, who is getting engaged today, i felt this strong sense of longing to go on. I am sometimes so tired of life.

We celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ our Lord - and its only because of the hope i have in Him, the purpose i know He has for my life that i can continue.

Trusting for an awesome 2011